Stallone, Barack Obama, Marvel Comics and the Very Real Secret War.

Stallone rocks. Why? Because unlike most of Hollywood, he knows the world has some pretty scary characters in it.

Do I write a post about Stallone’s new flick The Expendables, or do I cover the Obama administration’s Secret War tactics in the War on Terror? How about…both!

In the new trailer The Expendables, Stallone’s voiceover begins:

“We are the shadows…and the smoke in your eyes. We are the ghosts…that hide in the night.”

What does this mean? It means that the world is a dangerous place, and sometimes we need people to go in an clean up messes the civilized world would like to pretend don’t exist. Think the BP oil spill is a threat to humanity? Okay. But oily terrorists operating in lawless regions around the world can also cause messy explosions, gushers (of blood) on city streets, and black-charred coatings where beautiful things used to stand…

Sometimes, someone like George Bush comes around and is willing to openly talk

about the world’s scum buckets and dirt bags who’d like nothing better than to make Americans take dirt naps in densely populated urban areas. And people get angry, because if you acknowledge how susceptible free societies are to jihad nuts with a desire to return to the dark ages…it means you have a lot of tough decisions to make.

Even liberal writers like Brian Michael Bendis seem to know (really, really, deep down) that we live in a world where a Secret War or two or three or more…is being waged between competing visions for humanity’s future. The only problem is, when guys like George W. Bush are in office, liberal comic book writers come up with weird Bush-Gitmo allegories that inadvertently make the case for conservatism!

Can someone tell me when Brian Michael Bendis is going to lampoon Barack Obama in the comics for the very real “Secret War” that he’s apparently taken to another level? Don’t hold your breath:

Beneath its commitment to soft-spoken diplomacy and beyond the combat zones of Afghanistan and Iraq, the Obama administration has significantly expanded a largely secret U.S. war against al-Qaeda and other radical groups, according to senior military and administration officials..Obama, one senior military official said, has allowed “things that the previous administration did not.”

How many young voters pulled the lever for Barack Obama under the liberal auspices that we can live in harmony with jihadi head choppers if we just try really hard to “understand” and “reach” them? (My favorite is Richard Gere’s infamous post-9/11 suggestion that guys like Osama Bin Laden just need to be loved.)

It’s all a lie. The world is a dangerous place. Evil exists, despite what the Neal Gabler moral relativist Mole Men tell you. And it’s better to be honest and frank about that, because otherwise you create bizarre realities where “peace activists” (who try to slice through your liver with gigantor-knives when their cargo is about to be inspected) can play the victim-card. You also have scenarios play out where young people say, “Umm…what happened to all that hopeandchange?” (Yes, that’s one word):

The Obama administration has rejected the constitutional executive authority claimed by Bush and has based its lethal operations on the authority Congress gave the president in 2001 to use “all necessary and appropriate force against those nations, organizations, or persons” he determines “planned, authorized, committed, or aided” the Sept. 11 attacks.

Many of those currently being targeted, Bellinger said, “particularly in places outside Afghanistan,” had nothing to do with the 2001 attacks.

Weren’t there a lot of Democrats that voted for that? Hmmm. Nevermind.

The hopeandchange never materialized because it was never there. I bet the kiddies are feeling pretty numb, right now. It’s okay Thunder Kiss, conservatism will welcome you with open arms when the reality hits that it’s a strange, strange world (incompatible with “planned” economies and Youtube Diplomacy).

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a Stallone trailer to watch.

Hey Bendis, do you mind telling me when you’re going to roast Barack Obama for his Secret War? Want to weigh in, Marvel? Didn’t think so. Hypocrites. Deep down, all of these guys are furious that George W. Bush is going to be largely vindicated.

Iron Man is America.

While it might seem odd to comment on a movie before it comes out, I can’t contain myself with Iron Man 2. John Nolte has forced my hand:

Though the highly anticipated “Iron Man 2” qualifies as a hilarious, entertaining, irreverent, and openly patriotic summer blockbuster well worth the price of admission (and then some), like most sequels, the continuing story of Tony Stark and company does falls short of its predecessor…

Hilarious: Check. Entertaining: Check. Patriotic: Check.

That’s all I needed, John. Thanks. And now I’d like to take a moment to

Iron Man is America. Liberals refuse to accept how cool that is. Their loss.

describe why Iron Man is such a great character (despite the best efforts of liberal writers to ruin him with sad attempts at Bush/Cheney warmonger allegories)

The same thing that makes Iron Man great is the same thing that makes America the most Kick Ass country the world has ever seen. The Christian elements of our nation’s founding guarantee that the innate creativity of man is encouraged to blossom. God gave each of us gifts, and wants us to take full advantage of them.  Capitalism, Science, and The Rule of Law fused in America to produce a system that churns out ideas and innovation and entrepreneurs at an astounding rate—when the government gets out of the way.  The spirit of  America is embodied in the character of Tony Stark: He’s big. He’s bold. He shoots for the stars, and he’s unapologetic about his accomplishments.

However, like America, Tony Stark has his flaws. His same strengths can, at times, cause him to lose sight of himself.  Success can be a double-edged sword (or, ummm…malfunctioning repulsor ray?), but that doesn’t change the fact that he’s still inherently a hero. And that’s exactly where so many movies written by liberal Hollywood self-loathers get it wrong. They’re so concerned about offending France’s cheese eating elitist lecture circuit and the sensitivities of cultures that won’t even play Western movies, that their heroes come across as weak-kneed nincompoops. When you stand for everything you stand for nothing. And that makes for a horrible superhero movie.

Stan Lee, a living legend most non-comic fans have heard of, once said something to the effect: I wanted to take a character that was almost impossible to like and make him popular.

To a liberal like Lee (creative genius he may be) the idea that an entrepreneur like Tony Stark would be a hard sell is, quite frankly, politically tone deaf.  As much as liberals like to bash successful businessmen, the American people want to be them. As I said before, most people know that they have God-given talents and seek ways to cultivate them for the benefit of themselves and their family. Work is a virtue. Work is a gift. Giving to other people through our creative efforts is a satisfying and just endeavor, and profiting off of those efforts is equally as righteous. And that is something that liberals, for whatever reason, just don’t seem to understand.

This week I will see Iron Man 2. And I will most-likely enjoy it. And even if I don’t, I can take heart that a character who personifies American ingenuity gets to step into the limelight yet again.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go listen to that out.freakin’.standing. crooner Robert Downy Jr. And then watch…Lego Star Wars awesomeness. I suggest you take part too. You’ll thank me later.

Pee Wee’s Big Adventure: Starring The Federal Government

Do you remember Tim Burton’s directorial debut, Pee Wee’s Big Adventure? If you do, I’m sure you remember Francis Buxton. And if you do you’ll know exactly where I’m coming from when I say the federal government is Francis Buxton.

 

Francis Buxton. Perhaps you know him by his other name: The Federal Government.

 

Francis Buxton was a big, fat, immature bully who used someone else’s money to buy things he couldn’t afford. And when he couldn’t buy what he wanted…he stole it. The federal government isn’t any different, using your hard-earned cash to buy all sorts of things it can’t afford (although I will admit that it tends to favor cars instead of bikes). And when it knows that you can’t be bought off? It does what it wants anyway.

Luckily, when the theft is egregious enough, there’s usually someone who storms the castle, crashes the pool, grabs the behemoth around the gut, and confronts the jerk. And that is exactly what the American people need to do right now, although, as the movie demonstrates, sometimes that isn’t enough to work. Perhaps Francis’ daddy (e.g., labor unions and other liberal lobbyists) shows up in the knick of time to prevent the fraud from being exposed. Perhaps any number of strange events occur that prevent justice from being done.

What then? Well, going intellectually old-school John Woo is necessary, but so is methodically laying out the evidence for the people (even if “Amazing Larry” doesn’t believe you).

If those things are done, and done well, conservatives will be okay. And when the public policy breakthrough finally comes we can ride off into the sunset like Satan’s Little Helpers on their choppers…until the next obstacle throws us over the handlebars.

The Federal Government: Your Personal Stay Puft Marshmellow Man. Stick with The Private Sector.

Recently I was watching Bill O’Reilly discuss insurance companies, and how they “profit off the sick” with John Stossel. Normally I only like watching The No

Which is more dangerous: A government like Stay Puft...or Geraldo Rivera?

Spin Zone when Neil Cavuto gives him an economic beat down, but I think I can grow fond of Stossel picking up the old Irish guy and giving him an intellectual suplex. However, it mildly frustrated me when John had an opportunity to deal Bill a devastating blow, but opted to pull back instead. The idea that anyone who “profits off the sick” should somehow provide their service for free (or a severely-reduced charge) is silly, emotional, and endemic of the kind of appeals liberals make for their Federal Government Stay Puft Marshmellow Man Dreams. If Bill wasn’t 90 feet tall I’d slap him across the head and tell him to read a book or two by Thomas Sowell.

Here’s an example. Years ago I worked as a substitute teacher in a high school just outside Chicago. Before I became permanently assigned to one school, my workload for the week fluctuated with how many teachers were sick, on vacation, or taking a personal day. However, the bulk of the time I was making money off the stuffy noses, sore throats, and hospital stays of full-time educators! Every week I was pulling in enough money to pay my bills, support a few hobbies, and still save money for a rainy day. But, according to Bill’s logic (who admits the insurance industry’s profit margins are rather tame compared to others), I should somehow feel dirty for providing a much-needed service to those who required it.

Are insurance companies perfect? No. I’m sure there are areas of reform both conservatives and liberals can agree on. However, my problem with Bill is that he’s made the decision to pander to “the folks” the kind of pap John “Two Americas:“The One Where I’m Faithful and the One Where I’m Not” Edwards did on the campaign trail. Why? Because he still maintains he’s “Independent.” Okay, Bill… Give me a break.

If you’re “independent,” then Geraldo Rivera didn’t just get side-swiped by a giant wave. Or give away our troops’ position. Take your pick.

George Washington likened to Xenu followers, Alan Colmes normal? We have a lot of work to do.

I was recently talking with a friend in Los Angles about what I do for a

This guy is a cultist who believes in Xenu while Alan Colmes is considered normal? We have a lot of work to do.

living. In short, I told her, I get to promote a think tank that believes Free Enterprise, Limited Government, Individual Freedom, a Strong National Defense, and Traditional American values are the principles our public policies should be crafted in concert with. In short—our First Principles.

My friend’s response was that it sounded like I was “in a cult.”  And, while she was in no way trying to insult my person or my profession, I think she was inadvertently on to something, which is why I responded, “Sure, I’m in a cult…if you consider the Founding Fathers part of a cult.” My apolitical, left-leaning friend unwittingly voiced what conservatives have known for years: we now live in a United States where the roadmap the Founding Fathers actually intended future generations to follow is now foreign to large swathes of the American public.—particularly young people. Liberalism and the moral relativism that comes part and parcel with it has muddied up the learning pool enough so that things that were once “self-evident” no longer are, and past axioms associated with freedom and liberty are no longer such—they must be questioned and examined.

To you and I, the evidence is clear that free societies are strongly correlated with prosperity and economic growth. To you and I, bloated government is like an out of control Zeppelin that clumsily teeters to-and-fro before crashing and burning into a sickening display of wreckage. But to countless others, there is no intellectual double-take when the same people who can’t run a post office decide they want to control the ultimate package: You, and the health and well-being housed inside (Kudos to any liberal critics who pick apart this post by pointing out that “Ultimate Package” sounds like a really bad 80’s adult film, but it still doesn’t undermine the soundness of the argument).

It’s a sad and pathetic existence when smart, creative young people in the prime of their lives are trained like Pavlov’s dogs to doubt the potential for greatness inside them (the key to their release?). Instead of cultivating a nation of go-getters who would look at the US economy’s flotsam and jetsam and make something new and bright and bold that might change the world for the better—because of their initiative—we’re planting the seeds for a nation of reticent loafs who wait for third parties to tell them what to do and how to do it.

It would be easy to blame the usual suspects (e.g. Hollywood, liberal academics, etc.) for the situation we find ourselves in, but in this instance I think it’s important for conservatives to look in the mirror and take ownership for the part they play in colonization of America by Alan Colmes clones.

When you’re trying to paddle to a destination up steam, a really a good idea is to paddle with a force greater than that of the current. Sure, the Tea Party movement is fighting furiously to save us from quickly becoming a nation of Nanny State slaves wallowing in subsidized mediocrity like blissfully ignorant pigs, but what if it’s too late? What if we’re too close to the waterfall and no amount of paddling can save us?

Personally, I don’t think we’re at that point (I’m an eternal optimist), but conservatives need to learn some hard lessons from this moment in history.  When fighting against the tide of liberalism, whether it’s on a college campus or the entertainment industry or any other aspect of our lives, we need to work twice as hard as the next guy and always be on the lookout for new ways to innovate from within, educate the public outside the Beltway, and disseminate amongst all contributors to the movement.

And if you haven’t gotten anything from this post I award you no points…and may God have mercy on your soul.

Kathy Griffin: Hollywood’s Stale Chocolate Easter Bunny.

When Kathy Griffin dies and God asks her what she did with her life, I wonder if she’ll be dumb enough to lie about it to the Big Guy, or if she’ll truthfully answer I was a mean-spirited ginger leech that made a career off people more successful than I.

Kathy Griffin comes from the same school of thought as Jeneane everyone is dumb but my haiku public policy poet friend Rosie O’Donnell Garofalo.  Personally, I find this odd coming from someone who can’t even get

through an Anderson Cooper New Years Eve broadcast without making a fool out of herself. Regardless, again and again the question comes up: Why are these people so angry? Why is someone so “liberated” from religion that they’re okay telling Jesus to “suck it,” perpetually agitated?

No matter what you think of Sarah Palin (I bet we can guess Christopher Buckley’s position), I can’t really ever recall her ever being mean-spirited in an interview. I do recall other people with a penchant for cheap jokes and low blows. Even if we include Dave “Secret Intern CBS Adultery Lair” Letterman and Bill my own audience thinks I’m nuts” Maher, we wouldn’t be scratching the surface of bitter liberal talking heads with an unhealthy obsession of wishing ill-will on those who disagree with them.

I think one of the driving forces behind the creation of “the bitter liberal” is moral relativism. People who don’t believe humanity was “endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights” – people who believe there are no universal truths and who live only to please themselves – find the existence they’ve carved out to be rather hollow. And instead of taking a step back and reevaluating their world view they allow that little gnawing hollowness inside them grow until they might as well be a stale, chocolate Easter bunny. Ironic, isn’t it Kathy?

Now if you’ll excuse me, it looks like I have another vacuous human being to read up on. Although, unlike Kathy, I’m cognizant of the fact that he’s much more dangerous than she.

Yippie Ki-yay…Steve Doocy. Bruce Willis is Sheer Awesomeness.

It was a toss-up tonight. I was either going to blog on the sheer awesomeness of Bruce Willis inspired by his cameo in a Gorillaz video, or Steve Doocy (he’s got a fever, and the only prescription is more nepotism!) Bruce Willis won, which means Doocy gets a reprieve…for now. It’s probably better that way; I’d rather write about someone who is in good company with patriots like Michael Yon than Fox and Sons who get that big break because their dad’s on the payroll Friends.

Bruce Willis admits he has a conservative streak in his veins. How deep is it? I’m not sure. He does mediocre buddy cop movies with liberal guys who are threats to national security.

But that’s what I like about Bruce Willis-he gets along with everyone (even Hollywood guys who hang out in liberal echo chambers), and he’s willing to take chances. For every misstep there’s a Hartigan or a John McClane or David Dunn.

Bruce Willis takes chances that sometimes blow your mind and sometimes come up short, but he almost always plays the hero. And when he’s “on”, he’s on. He’s noble. He’s tough. He’s no-nonsense, and he gets the job done. Bruce Willis is a rarity today, like Clint Eastwood.

Speaking of which, Eastwood has a connection with Gorillaz as well. And since I have a writing background, coming full circle like this dictates I bring this post to an end.

Yippie ki-yay...Steve Doocy.

In short, love your conservative movie icons. They don’t come around too often. Yet. And we need to do what we can to cultivate more men like him, because if we don’t we’ll one day have a world where Steve Doocy rules. And when that happens we’re all dead.

I’m just kidding. Sort of.

Liberalism: The World’s Rick Moranis

If you’ve read this blog you know I’m a pop-culture junkie, which means that Allahpundit over at hotair has left me no choice but to wrap my arms around his blog post like Steven Guttenberg would a little baby.

Anyone wondering why liberal Hollywood would remake Police Academy should also wonder why liberal Hollywood always goes back to the proven public policy box office bombs peddled by progressives throughout history.

Personally, the majority of the time I look at liberalism as an ideology modeled on the life work of Rick Moranis. Sure, liberals always portray themselves as cool (and they’ve done a good job marketing it, I’ll admit that), but it can be delegitimized if we get a few astute observers pointing out that often times their social experiments shrink things (i.e., the economy), blow things up (i.e., federal deficits), or become monsters with a life of their own (i.e., endless entitlement programs). And sometimes…they befriend the world’s Gozer clones (e.g., Sean Penn’s man-crush on Hugo Chavez).

Allah then goes on to mention another important point in a recent thread, which will carry this blog post home:

“The government is no more evil than are big corporations, Wall Street bankers, university professors, media barons, Pentagon generals or anybody else. I am sick of the way our government leaders and our financial titans behave, and I think they do not have the best interest of the country at heart. But to declare them as an entire class ‘evil’ is not only to be unserious about the challenges facing us, but it’s also to run the risk of a kind of utopian thinking that can destroy lives and whole societies.”

Just because the Ideology of Rick Moranis sometimes cuddles up with creatures from another dimension that could bring about hell on earth, it’s still dangerous to start sliming people as “evil” with whom we disagree. That’s why I stick to things like Barack Obama: America’s Orko. Because when you start demonizing your critics, you turn into Janeane Garafalo and Rosie O’Donnell.

Shutter Island, Liberalism, and YOU.

I saw Shutter Island last night, and I must say it’s a great film for anyone looking to take the wind out of their Friday sails. I think the most uplifting part of my night was the Iron Man 2 trailer. After that, it was all insanity and sad stories and Nazi Germany war crime flashbacks.

With that said, Leonardo DiCaprio’s character,Teddy Daniels, asks a great question at the end of the film: “Is it better to live as a monster or die a good man.”

I promise I won’t ruin the film like someone who tells you Bruce Willis is dead at the end of Sixth Sense, but I would like to draw some parallels between this film and the federal government:

Teddy Daniels gets himself stuck in a federal penitentiary for the criminally insane. Many of the inmates don’t even know they’re locked in an insane asylum. They put up mental barriers to block any knowledge that the federal government is holding them, and often concoct rosy realities to deal with their loss of freedom.

In some ways our world is the flip side of that coin: very sane people like Peggy Joseph, who I mentioned shortly before seeing the movie, are actually trapped in a federal prison without even knowing it. And yes, they’re so deluded that they think Barack Obama will make their mortgage payments!

As I mentioned yesterday, government dependence is like a drug. It saps the will of free people, making them less likely to realize their full potential. It’s the federal government saying, “You need me,” when…you don’t.

Think back on your own life milestones. Think back to all those moments where you had to dig and scratch and claw and fight for something you weren’t sure was attainable–and the moment where you questioned whether you had the strength or the intelligence or will to go on—right before you succeeded. How did you feel afterward? If you’re like me you were shocked, heartened, and invigorated. And if you’re like me you were a little disappointed in all the times you second-guessed yourself and thought about giving in, knowing that if you had done so the success before you would never have happened.

And THAT is what a massive federal government takes away from its people. And THAT is a crime. Politicians who promise you the stars in the sky at someone else’s expense (e.g., “fat cat” businessmen, “Big Oil”, “Wallstreet”, etc.) aren’t telling you the whole truth. Sure, they’re taking money from a third party and redistributing wealth (which is also wrong), but they’re also stealing something much more important than money—from you. They’re stealing the spark that turns what’s special inside of you into an explosion of technology, art, ideas, businesses, and acts of greatness that benefit all mankind. And you should be livid. And you should be angry. And you should not drink the water.

Because when you refuse to take their little pills, they’ll be the ones who go insane.

Marvel’s Captain Liberal America finally exposed

Big Hollywood is already poking fun at Marvel for the newest issue of Captain America that portrays the Tea Party movement as a bunch of racist extremist nut cases. However, this really isn’t anything new for Marvel.

Recently, the Civil War story line was Marvel’s Bush allegory wet dream (that lasted for months). After that there was Secret Invasion, which saw Captain America finally die for a bizarre liberal interpretation of “civil liberties” for super hero – and by extension super villain – communities.

Question for Marvel: In a world where your neighbor could walk into your house, rape your wife and kids on a daily basis, and then mind-wipe you so you never remembered it happened, wouldn’t the government have a vested interest in knowing about it? Wouldn’t it make sense to have a running list of how many people could blow up entire city blocks if they got cranky or their significant other cheated on them? Apparently not to Captain Liberal America, who in recent years should have donned a smurf blue UN helmet and renamed himself Captain Appeasement.

Do a little research into Cap’s exploits over the years and you’ll find no shortage of racist, xenophobic, bigoted Americans in Steve Rogers’ rogues gallery. When Cap isn’t fighting redneck extremists he’s often battling villains who were created by his own government.

How many years has it been since September 11th and how many al Qaeda plots has Captain America thwarted? Where are the Black Ops in Afghanistan? I know the answer, but this is a blog post and not a book on how big of a comic nerd I am.

In short: Marvel’s post 9/11 Captain America story lines have been pathetic displays of moral relativism that only dared to pass judgment if the subject of scorn is the United States of America.