Kathy Griffin – Douglas Ernst Blog

KathyFerengiGriffin — Kathy Griffin, with her Ferengi personality (minus the intelligence) isn’t even a “trained monkey” for CNN hosts because you don’t have to train monkeys to fling poo. She’s just sad.

Every so often I have to return to Kathy “Stale Chocolate Easter Bunny” Griffin because others feel the need to give her exposure she doesn’t deserve. While I am in fact contributing to the problem at the moment, I hope that by clarifying a few things about the Bravo network’s personality that just a few more people will refrain from giving her the time of day in the future.

Kathy Griffin, at some point in her life, decided she was going to make a career out of emulating all the worst traits of the Ferengi of Star Trek: The Next Generation. She’s lewd, crude, and unapologetically flaunts her lack of a moral compass. Sadly, there’s enough people who perceive her schtick (although I can’t really call it a “schtick” since I don’t think it’s an act) as rebellious when the reality is…she’s just a loser. One of the things that made the Ferengi interesting was that they were actually intelligent. Kathy Griffin isn’t smart; she’s just willing to say mean things about people on cue, like a trained monkey for CNN reporters like John King and Dana Bash. Although, maybe Kathy isn’t even a trained monkey, since monkeys don’t need training to fling their poo… Sad.

Case in point: Calling Scott Brown’s daughters prostitutes. How much creativity did it take to come up with that? Answer: Zero. But I don’t begrudge Kathy her success. I think it’s somewhat great that someone who eats intellectual diarrhea and dishes it up to willing customers for a living has found a way to make living out of it. To take the analogy a step further (and perhaps I shouldn’t), Kathy is like a genetic mutation—a cross between a dung beetle and a monkey that a small subset of the world’s population finds fascinating.

I know you don’t believe in God, Kathy, but God Bless you. And when you die, have fun explaining how you used your one life trying to get others to adopt your sour disposition.

When Kathy Griffin dies and God asks her what she did with her life, I wonder if she’ll be dumb enough to lie about it to the Big Guy, or if she’ll truthfully answer I was a mean-spirited ginger leech that made a career off people more successful than I.

Kathy Griffin comes from the same school of thought as Jeneane everyone is dumb but my haiku public policy poet friend Rosie O’Donnell Garofalo. Personally, I find this odd coming from someone who can’t even get

through an Anderson Cooper New Years Eve broadcast without making a fool out of herself. Regardless, again and again the question comes up: Why are these people so angry? Why is someone so “liberated” from religion that they’re okay telling Jesus to “suck it,” perpetually agitated?

No matter what you think of Sarah Palin (I bet we can guess Christopher Buckley’s position), I can’t really ever recall her ever being mean-spirited in an interview. I do recall other people with a penchant for cheap jokes and low blows. Even if we include Dave “Secret Intern CBS Adultery Lair” Letterman and Bill “my own audience thinks I’m nuts” Maher, we wouldn’t be scratching the surface of bitter liberal talking heads with an unhealthy obsession of wishing ill-will on those who disagree with them.

I think one of the driving forces behind the creation of “the bitter liberal” is moral relativism. People who don’t believe humanity was “endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights” – people who believe there are no universal truths and who live only to please themselves – find the existence they’ve carved out to be rather hollow. And instead of taking a step back and reevaluating their world view they allow that little gnawing hollowness inside them grow until they might as well be a stale, chocolate Easter bunny. Ironic, isn’t it Kathy?

Now if you’ll excuse me, it looks like I have another vacuous human being to read up on. Although, unlike Kathy, I’m cognizant of the fact that he’s much more dangerous than she.