Dave Matthews’ Environmental Amnesia: His Own Sick Slick in Chicago River.

Dave Matthews is suddenly concerned  about harmful sludge discharged from the bowels of the earth, and the effect it has on living creatures in and around the sullied water.  It wasn’t too long ago, however, that good old Dave didn’t give a hoot about the oil slicks and tar balls the bowels of The Dave Matthews Band unleashed on unsuspecting citizens drifting along the Chicago River.

“It’s a national problem that requires a national solution,” (Dave Matthews on the Gulf Oil Spill…not to be confused with statements made when his tour bus dumped 800 lbs. of human waste on innocent bystanders).

In the same ad Dave implores you to” [Demand] restoration and protection of America’s Gulf Coast.”  Kind of like the state of Illinois demanded $70,000 bucks from you Dave, for “violating state environmental laws”!  I’m sure some of your fans would say, “Funny the way it is”?…

And finally, if you watch the video you’ll see almost all the stars except Dave ask participants to “Be the one” to help restore the Gulf Coast. Why the mysterious absence from that portion, Dave?  Methinks it’s because you’re too much of a fan of “Number Two.”

Don’t drink the water

Dave Matthews can dump 800 pounds of his own human waste on you, but don't you dare let an oil gasket blow BP, or he'll come running (I'm talking about with his feet, not his bowels...I think)

in the Gulf because it’s a.) salt water and b.) oily. And don’t drink the water in Chicago when Dave comes to town unless your Brita Filter is altered for microbiological eclectic rock band waste filtration.

And yes, I know the Space Between what Dave’s band was responsible for and what BP and the federal government is responsible for is huge…but someone has to remind others that the liberal moral pedestal back patters tend to use the world as their personal toilet when they think no one is looking.

Consider yourself Crushed, Dave.

Dave Matthews: I look so concerned about the environment here. You would never know I paid out tens of thousands for my own environmental disaster that left people covered in sludge.

Obama to Use Greek Temple from Democratic Convention to Plug Hole.

I turns out that the Washington Post is shocked (shocked, I tell you!) that people actually expect Barack Obama to deliver the goods on a wide range of public policy issues that he…ummm, campaigned on.  And the Washington Post is shocked (shocked, I tell you!) that the guy who doesn’t sweat is suddenly sweating it big time when it comes to that big messy earth-pore gushing junk at the bottom of the ocean:

Why can’t he . . . well, you get the point. Obama, it turns out, is not Superman. In (unhappy) truth, no president is, no matter how politically gifted and no matter how many people, in this country and around the world, root for his success.

Wait a second…so it turns out that giving someone a Nobel Peace Prize before they’ve ever actually achieved tangible results isn’t a really clever way to trick dictators and despots into being “swell” guys? You mean the candidate who claimed electing him would be “the moment…when the rise of the oceans began to slow and the planet began to heal” suddenly finds himself presiding over rising (oily) tides caused by a hemorrhaging hole in the earth?  You don’t say.

I have an idea: Why doesn’t someone find that huge set of Greek Pillars Obama used for his Denver convention speech and use it to plug the hole in the Gulf? One would think that a Greek Temple created to symbolize the greatness of The One would be big enough to put a stop to all of this. That is…unless they were fake imitations of the real thing. Hmmm.

It is only at the end of the piece that—in passing—that the author acknowledges Barack Obama’s own culpability in the credibility gap he now experiences:

Obama, fairly enough, is reaping what he sowed in assigning himself an impossible mission as a global savior. But Americans are his culpable enablers. Few people want to hear this, but he’s doing the best he can, considering the difficult circumstances that he and the nation face. And what he needs most from the public is a quality that distinguishes adults from children: patience.

George Bush was going to go "Old School" on your grandpa using the Patriot Act, but Obama is "doing the best he can"? Hypocrites.

I don’t really remember calls for “patience” when George W. Bush was trying to figure out how to secure victory in Iraq. I do remember Harry Reid literally surrendering to our enemies. Regardless, this sets the stage nicely for Democrats to call for extensions of Obama’s Afghanistan timeline since the reality on the ground doesn’t seem to be cooperating with his previous rhetoric and artificial pullout dates.  Obama’s doing “the best he can…considering the difficult circumstances that he and the nation face.” That’s so weird, because in a post 9/11 world it seemed like that’s exactly what George W. Bush was doing, and the left was trying to convince us that he was going to go Old School on your grandpa with federal agents using the Patriot Act, make himself King George by fiat, and say “FUDGE IT!” to the U.S. Constitution. But that didn’t happen. Instead, he’s making Facebook videos with a bit of the same charm and grace he showed in office (albeit with an awkward green screen viewers can do without).

When it comes to Afghanistan, I’m willing to give the president all the time he (and the nation) needs in order to succeed.  I will never play politics with national security or go down in history like Harry Reid, 21st Century Retreat Monkey.  It’s just annoying how the appeals for “patience” only happen when a Democrat is in office.

My name is Douglas Ernst, and I hereby endorse The Axl Rose Doctrine in times of war.

The "Axl Rose Doctrine " apparently only applies to the nation when a Democrat is in office during a time of war. For those of you without a MA in AxlRosian thought, we're talking about "Patience."

President Barack “Sea Bass” Obama.

I love the guys at hotair, but at the same time they really need to stop

Who knew the President was modeling his presidency on "Sea Bass" from Dumb and Dumber?

calling President Obama “Kickass.”  Why? Because Kickass is actually a great movie with American Exceptionalism written all over it! I’d hate for anyone to start associating that movie with President Obama because a faux macho charade was employed to appease the “glib” Matt Lauers of the world during a time of crisis.

Personally, I’d like people to start calling the President “Sea Bass” from the Jim Carrey classic, Dumb and Dumber. I think the “Kick his ass, Sea Bass!” refrain fits rather nicely when making Gulf oil spill presidential analogies as well.  And, in some strange way, I think it’s safe to say Americans feel like Jim Carrey in the infamous gas station bathroom scene…

If the kids were looking for hopeandchange, they now know that they didn’t get it. How can I make such a claim? Easy. When Jon Stewart goes Wolvie Berserk style and leaves the President with intellectual adamantium poisoning and claw slashes inches deep…it’s over.  It’s just sad that it took so long for so many people to see the Milli Vanilli nature of it all.  It’s little consolation to consider myself part of the “called it way back when” crowd.

So, in short, as much as I love the fake movie posters, I don’t want to see a great movie like Kickass sullied by the President’s handling of the BP Oil Spill. If you start linking good movies with liberalism, even in jest, Hit Girl’s nemesis, Roger Ebert, might start liking her. And that would just be wrong.

Many Americans are closing their eyes, sucking their thumbs, and deciding to pretend nothing bad happened after it's all over. I'm not one of them...but I understand the desire to do so.

Butterfly Effect Actor: Chaos Theory Meets Ashtonian Idiocy.

Ashton Kutcher: Hard data? What's that? Pay attention to my bow tie and vapid partisan pot shots that will convince Keith Olbermann I'm a "serious" thinker.

When Ashton Kutcher isn’t practicing his diplomatic baboon calls in an attempt to make Russians adopt his man-boy worldview, he’s blaming Republicans for environmental disasters.

“If you can go back to the Republican National Drill…and look the guys in the eyes who were saying ‘Drill! Drill! Drill!’ at the Republican National Convention—those guys—there you go! That’s what you got!”

As I mentioned before, I think it’s interesting that the guys who claim to be all about science and technology want to simply stop everything and call it quits in the face of adversity (even though oil represents 40 percent of our energy consumption).

Ever wonder what percentage wind and solar make up after decades of subsidies? Try 3 percent, Ashton.

Actually, the truth of the matter isn’t that Aston doesn’t care about science. The truth is this: he has money to ride out the wait in style if a Rosie O’Donnel and Woody Allen Daydream Dictator is ever able to halt oil production tomorrow.  Even if it took decades.  Just like all liberal celebrities, once they make their millions they’re perfectly fine telling you to live in the dark, pick head lice off your friend, and return to the lush green-wooded yesteryear. No thanks, Ashton (intertribal rape and infanticide were never that appealing).

How much oil does Ashton use jetsetting around the globe? Or “Punking” people? I’m reasonably sure that there’s been days where the oil needed to make a memorable “Ashton Kutcher Vacation” was more than I’ll consume in an entire lifetime. Think about the pollution caused making and promoting Dude, Where’s My Car? What a jerk.

Hey Ashton, remember that movie you did that no one saw called The Butterfly Effect? Well, it’s sort of true. The only problem is, you’re proud pronouncements of public policy idiocy are touching young impressionable minds. I suggest retiring to one of your many mansions (that I’m sure have thermostats set just to your liking), and thinking about what a hypocrite you are. Put one of your private jets on autopilot when you’re on a press junket and fly it into the ocean—maybe that will plug the gusher.

PS: Is that Russian outreach paying dividends yet? Didn’t think so.

Update: I am SO kicking myself for having forgotten about this…

No one saw The Butterfly Effect, but Kutcher's winged ignorance can be felt from miles away.

Rosie O’Donnell: Summer Lovin’ Commie Thug Tactics.

It turns out that the Woody Allen dictator itch has claimed another victim: Rosie O’Donnell. One would think that after being used for intellectual target practice by Magnum PI that Rosie would give the moral pedestal pontificating a rest. I guess not. Communist summer lovin’ on Rosie’s radio show went as follows:

EUAN MORTON: This is a ridiculous idea, ’cause we don’t live in a utopian, what’s the word, communist society, but wouldn’t you just love to have the federal government and I know people talk about big government and all the rest of it, it’s just nonsense, I’d love to have the federal government take over the oil companies, use the money to give our children free education, and then in the future we can educate our children to start doing things like solar power, wind power…

O’DONNELL: …James Carville said the best thing. He said Obama needs to come down here and tell BP, ‘I’m your daddy, I am takin’ it over’, but they haven’t been able to do it […]

Why are the same people who were terrified that Bush was ordering government agents to see how many times you checked out Dr. Seuss books for your kid at the public library suddenly wetting themselves like excited puppies at the thought of an Obama-Stalin reincarnation? And why are the same people who got upset during the presidential campaign at the insinuation Obama would consolidate more power in Washington now drooling like Pavlovian dogs when someone talks of “Hugo Chavez on ideological HGH” tactics here at home?

If Rosie wasn’t such a True Believer she’d know that simply throwing money at a problem doesn’t fix it. There is plenty of good research on Education and Healthcare to make her think twice about the liberal worldview. But Rosie has never read Eric Hoffer and she doesn’t care about what the data actually says because (by her own admission) she yearns for own personal dictator-thug.

Good luck with that, Rosie. Perhaps you and Woody Allen can get married, have kids, and then inculcate them with the great intentions of Commie thugs throughout history (we’ll just forget about body count).

Oh, wait, that will never happen because you’re…you, and he sleeps with his adopted daughter. Never mind.

Bill Maher: Al Sharpton Bullhorn Boycott-proof…Because He’s Liberal.

What would liberals, particularly the New York Times’ Charles Blow, say if I told him Bill O’Reilly said the following:

“I thought when we elected a black president, we were going to get a black president. You know, this [BP oil spill] is where I want a real black president. I want him in a meeting with the BP CEOs, you know, where he lifts up his shirt where you can see the gun in his pants. That’s — (in black man voice) we’ve got a ‘motherfu**ing problem here?’ Shoot somebody in the foot.”

Something tells Charles Blow would not be a happy camper. In fact, I’m pretty sure he would be downright livid.

Now, what if I told Mr. Blow that in actuality it was liberalism’s favorite intellectual bile belcher Bill Maher who had said it? Somehow, I think the criticism would be rather muted. Am I wrong? But the interesting thing about Bill Maher’s diatribe are the observations that begin to form because of it, and any one of them that might accurately depict what’s going on is bad news for Maher:

  • He actually believes “real” black people have their “blackness” measured by how much of a thug they are.
  • He doesn’t believe it, but he knows he has an immunity card to make “jokes” that would have Al Sharpton boycotts complete with blaring megaphones outside anyone
    Bill Maher: When you're liberal you can insult black people all day and get away with it. Or maybe they ignore me because they know I'm just a really mean, bitter person....

    else’s studio. The result: he gets to perpetuate a stereotype, but he leaves other people to clean up the cultural mess he makes.

  • He does believe it, and he knows he has a pass.

If you examine those who are usually the butt of Bill Maher’s jokes you’ll see that he holds a contemptuous view of almost all of them (e.g., religious people of any stripe, conservatives, anyone who disagrees with him)—which leads me to believe he thinks the same of black people. Like Keith “I admit I’m a racist” Olbermann, Bill knows that liberals can say the most insulting, derogatory things about “protected” groups and the Political Correctness Cops will turn a blind eye.  They can’t let the word get out that liberals have just as many ignoramuses in their camp as everyone else because then the mystique is gone.  The Racist Boogeyman is an important election-season card liberals depend on, and without it they’re at a severe disadvantage.  It’s hard to convince people to continue voting for you with unemployment near 10%, gut-busting federal deficits, stimulus bills that didn’t stimulate, healthcare bills passed that voters didn’t want, and oil spill response debacles that get worse with each passing day…without the conservative boogeyman to fall back on.

ToeJam and Earl ran from the Boogeyman. Liberals create him every election season.

Liberalism is in trouble. It’s crumbling abroad and giving Americans a sneak peak at what we have to look forward to if we continue on the Nanny State path. It’s exposed on the internet (which is why the president isn’t happy with new technology in your hands), and it’s beginning to sink in with young people that their professors are full of it.

Keep talking, Bill Maher.  In some sick and twisted way you’re the conservative’s best friend.

Update: Mediaite weighs in on this as well.

Kanye West: Protest Impact Impaired by Really Big Sunglasses, Doofus Quotient.

It turns out that Kanye West of “George Bush Hates Black People” fame is coming

Zack de la Rocha teams up with Kanye West to protest Arizona...even though Zack dreams of forcibly removing Kanye from his mansion and giving it to "the people of the sun."

out with a brand new album, but the same old stupidity is on display with his decision to join Sound Strike—a musical boycott of Arizona over its new immigration law.

Sound Strike has been put together by Zack de la Roca. You might know him from Rage Against the Machine, a band that churned out hard rock albums with an Aztlán-twist:

With their borders and boots on top of us
Pullin’ knobs on the floor of their toxic metropolis
So how you gonna get what you need ta get?
The gut eaters, drenched get offensive like that
When the fifth sun sets get back reclaim
The spirit of Cuahtemoc alive an untamed
Now face the funk now blastin’ out ya
The vulture tried to steal your name but now you got a gun
Ya this is for the people of the sun

Its comin’ back around again
This is for the people of the sun
Its comin’ back around again

Something tells me that in de la Rocha’s perfect world, guys like Kanye have their LA mansions confiscated and handed over to their “rightful” owners…(which doesn’t include successful black rappers, Sonic Youth, or most of the other artists taking part in moral pedestal back-patting boycotts).

I’ve talked about Arizona’s immigration bill at length, and sometimes it even pains me to do it. No fair-minded person can say that I’m an ideologue on the subject. But it’s laughable to me that de la Rocha, a guy whose true feelings on the issue would repulse most Americans, is trying to pass himself off as a voice of reason.

And it’s even more ridiculous that Kanye West, after further solidifying his place in the hallowed halls of musically-talented jackasses throughout history with the Taylor Swift fiasco, would have the nerve to cast himself as the arbiter of what’s acceptable and what deserves a boycott when it comes to anything.

Hey Kanye, shouldn’t you be locked in your room contemplating conspiracy theories about the government concocting AIDS to kill people?

Before you ask me to get a job today, can I at least get a raise on a minimum wage?/And I know the government administered AIDS/
So I guess we just pray like the minister say/ Allah o Akbar and throw em some hot cars…

I heard em say you had a single that just dropped. Power, I believe it’s called:

No one man should have all that power…The clocks ticking I just count the hours/Stop tripping, I’m tripping off the powder/’Till then [F] that, the world’s ours…they say I was the abomination of Obama’s nation…

You’re right, Kanye. That’s why it surprises me that you voted for Obama with the same fervor that produces Woody Allen dictatorship dreams and George Lopez mean streaks. Oh, wait, you were on “powder.” I guess you have something in common with Billie Joe Gravity Bong of Green Day…

I’ll see you at the BP Oil Relief Concert for the fisherman affected by the environmental disaster. And I fully expect you to take part in a mumbling, stumbling, trembling diatribe like you did with Bush during Hurricane Katrina. I won’t hold my breath though because we all know it’s Reagan’s fault (at least, that’s what the liberals who find my blog are typing into search engines…)

You don’t have power, Kanye…unless power is measured by the pairs of really big sunglasses you own. And you don’t have influence…unless influence is measured in non-voters who spend their time on Youtube defending you over your latest unforced error public embarrassment.

If Reagan was Obama, Challenger Explosion “Kennedy’s Fault.”

There’s been a lot of coverage about the BP oil spill, the political fallout, and the occasionally interesting article from guys like

If Reagan was Obama: “My fellow Americans: Blame Kennedy. ‘Space’ is so off the table right now it’s not even funny.”

Charles Krauthammer. However, if there is anything good to come out of this disaster, it’s the following observation by casual observers:

  • WE ARE NOT RUNNING OUT OF OIL.

At least twice a year I read some article trying to scare people into thinking we’re only “x” number of years from running out of oil. When I was in elementary school I remember being handed the occasional Weekly Reader that would do the same. Luckily, I made it through the Captain Planetization of America’s youth unscathed, but we can’t say that for most of my generation.

The oil is there. In fact, it’s quite a few places.  As Krauthammer notes, it’s kept from us for political reasons:

Environmental chic has driven us out there. As production from the shallower Gulf of Mexico wells declines, we go deep (1,000 feet and more) and ultra deep (5,000 feet and more), in part because environmentalists have succeeded in rendering the Pacific and nearly all the Atlantic coast off-limits to oil production. (President Obama’s tentative, selective opening of some Atlantic and offshore Alaska sites is now dead.) And of course, in the safest of all places, on land, weve had a 30-year ban on drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge.

Personally, I think it’s rather amazing that we can mine for oil in some of the deepest waters on earth, with landscapes and environments in many respects as exotic and unexplored as parts of the moon. Did we stop going to space after the Space Shuttle Challenger explosion? No. In fact, Reagan gave one of the most amazing eulogies I’ve ever heard…and then we regrouped:

…On this day three hundred and ninety years ago, the great explorer Sir Francis Drake died aboard ship off the coast of Panama. In his lifetime the great frontiers were the oceans, and a historian later said, “He lived by the sea, died on it, and was buried in it.” Well, today, we can say of the Challenger crew: Their dedication was, like Drake’s, complete.

The crew of the space shuttle Challenger honored us by the manner in which they lived their lives. We will never forget them, nor the last time we saw them, this morning, as they prepared for their journey and waved goodbye and “slipped the surly bonds of earth” to “touch the face of God.”

If Ronald Reagan was Barack Obama it doesn’t seem out of the realm of possibility that he’d find a way to blame Kennedy…  The fact is, natural resources are abundant and waiting to be used. Decades of subsidies for wind and solar as an alternative to our energy needs have proven to be…lacking in the results department, to put it nicely. The kind of lifestyle we want will be provided by fossil fuels for the foreseeable future. Given that, it doesn’t make much sense to walk away from deep water drilling because of an environmental disaster.

What does make sense is to figure out what went wrong, fix it, and then cautiously continue creating and innovating our way to a better future.

I thought liberals owned science and technology as issues? I guess not.