The ExpendaBelles: A bad idea with a high probability of failure

It was only a matter of time. With the success of ‘The Expendables’ franchise, Stallone decided to push it. He couldn’t help himself, and the result will be ‘The ExpendaBelles.’ Why, Sly? Why?

Deadline Hollywood reports:

Robert Luketic has come aboard to direct The ExpendaBelles, the estrogen-powered equivalent of the testosterone-fueled Millennium Films franchise The Expendables. …

The logline: When America’s Navy SEALs are wiped out trying to penetrate the island lair of a deadly despot who has captured one of the world’s top nuclear scientists, it becomes clear that there is no such thing as the right man for the job and that this is a mission so impossible that only women can handle it. The only way in: some of the world’s deadliest female operatives must pose as high-class call-girls shipped in by private plane to satisfy a dictator–and instead save the scientist and the day. …

[Executive Producer Avi] Lerner said he was in talks with Meryl Streep, Cameron Diaz and Milla Jovovich. I’m told that nobody is set and that they are just now coming up with the short list.

When ‘The Expendables’ came out in 2010, guys who grew up in the 80s were psyched because their childhood action heroes were teaming up at least one more time to kick ass and take names. A super team of testosterone-fueled muscle heads together in movie? Even if it was bad, it was going to be good. It was a throwback to a time when action stars had real muscles and the explosions weren’t created inside a computer. Since all aging guys love to show the young ones that they “still got it,” you couldn’t help but root for Sly and his band of merry mercenaries. Fans got to see Stallone go head-to-head with JCVD in ‘The Expendables 2’ and the final installment this summer will without a doubt have a showdown that will be worth the price of admission (even if the rest of the movie is forgettable). How can any action movie starring Meryl Streep and Cameron Diaz compete with that?

‘The Expendables’ worked because it had a fairly large built-in audience that was hungry for the product. Just the prospect of Stallone, Schwarzenegger and Willis tearing it up together on screen was worth millions — even if the reality ended up being cameos by Arnold and Bruce. Women typically don’t like shoot-em-up action flicks. They just don’t. And guys don’t want to see Meryl Streep as a “high-class call-girl.” Casting Angelina Jolie, Milla Jovovich and Sigourney Weaver would be a good start, but what is the likelihood of nabbing the three of them?

Arnold Sly

The reason why guys still are willing to see a Stallone movie is because they know he does crazy stuff to his body in order to get the shot. Arnold and Sly end up in the same hospital for shoulder surgery because they’re still slinging weights and throwing punches. They put their body on the line to get that bone-crushing blow on film. They’ll put up with bruises if they can convince you they just took a few punches to the kidneys that said, “Get ready to pee blood for a week, buddy.”

Will Ms. Streep or Cameron Diaz do that? Of course not. That’s not to say they’re bad at their craft … it’s just that they simply aren’t going to draw the same kind of numbers for an action film that the right Stallone vehicle can.

“When America’s Navy SEALs are wiped out…” you call Meryl Streep and Cameron Diaz? Get the heck out of here. Linda Hamilton in 1991 shape? Okay. Maybe.

Do you remember the story of Icarus, who flew too close to the sun? Well, Stallone and Millennium Films are doing that with ‘The Expendables.’ It’s a bad idea, it has a high probability of failure (unless Quentin Tarantino randomly decides to direct), and its under performance will be blamed on sexism instead a gimmick that went too far.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have the ‘Expendables 3’ trailer to watch. I hope the guys go out of on good note.

Expendables 2 trailer: Proof Stallone knows the meaning of life

Battered, bloodied and bruised — but still smiling. That’s the meaning of life, and Stallone knows it. Made in America and a national treasure. Even when he’s bad he’s good.

The Expendables 2 trailer has officially landed, and it delivers the goods. As I said before, only sad, sad men and the women who love them are not psyched about this movie. Let’s think about the trailer for a second, shall we? Cheesy one liners? Check. Explosions on top of explosions? Check. Eastern European, former Communist military equipment? Check. Guns, guns and more guns? Check. Asian chick kicking ass? Check. Pure testosterone? Check. The list can go on and on.

Fact: Stallone knows the meaning of life. Life is about being 65 years old, living balls to the wall, getting battered and bruised, and then laughing about it with your buddies. If life was an orange Sly would be squeezing the s**t out of it until there wasn’t any juice left, looking at the rind, and then shoving it in his mouth and eating it just to say he ate the whole damn thing. He’s awesome. Period.

Conventional wisdom says Stallone, Schwarzenegger, and Willis should be drinking Ensure and thinking about “the good old days.” Instead of daydreaming about Rocky Balboa or Rambo he went out and created a whole new amazing franchise in his freakin’ 60’s!

Think about your friends from high school who are so out of shape that they’ve packed it in and act like sad-sack geriatrics before they’ve even lost their hair. Now think about Stallone convincingly going toe-to-toe, mano-e-mano with Van Damme at this stage of the game. It’s an inspiration.

Stallone, in silhouette, right before facing off against Van Damme. He’s still looking great after all these years.

Like the old school guns, cars, motorcycles and planes Stallone uses in The Expendables, he shows that age doesn’t need to matter because cool will always be cool. Age is inevitable, but you can kick ass until the day you die. If we think of Stallone’s body like a car it’s obvious that he loves and cares for it, but he’s going to use it and drive that thing into the ground because that’s what it was made for.

Years ago my mom, a second grade teacher at the time, would tell her coworkers how she would rather see Rocky and Rambo and any number of Stallone movies than some chick flick, and all the other women would look at her like she was from Mars. No mom, you weren’t nuts. In fact, a good litmus test to gauge someone’s sanity might be to ask them whether they would rather pay to see a marathon of Rocky, Rambo and The Expendables … or a You’ve Got Mail/Sleepless in Seattle double-feature.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an Expendables 2 trailer to watch … again.

Expendables 2 Trailer Hits: Only Liberal Men and Prissy Girls Not Psyched.

The Expendables 2 teaser trailer has landed with the force of a Chuck Norris roundhouse to the face. For those of you who haven’t seen the first film, I suggest you do. In an era where the best action hero a man can get is Matt Damon running from his own government, The Expendables brought back big guys with big guns boldly taking on evil bastards. Male moviegoers with erectile dysfunction claimed to have been cured after seeing the MPS AA-12 assault shotgun in action. Well, not really…but the scenes with it unleashing rounds were worth the price of admission alone.

Want to know what the plot is? Who cares! Stallone. Statham. Li. Lundgren. Norris. Crews. Couture. Hemsworth. Van Damme. Willis.  Schwarzenegger. That’s all you need to know, and if you need to know more you might want to check and make sure that someone isn’t spiking your orange juice with estrogen.

There are two kinds of people who will pan The Expendables 2: Prissy girls who think they’re a princess, and emasculated liberal men like Chris Matthews, who only watch movies where guys like Paul Giamatti play…emasculated liberal men. I say that not to besmirch Mr. Giamatti (he’s a fine actor), but to illustrate ahead of time that the critics who undoubtedly will hate this movie should immediately be discounted because it wasn’t made for them, and it was never intended to win them over.

What man didn’t grow up wishing he could see his favorite action stars thrown into one kick-ass movie of muscles, guns, fist fights, and explosions? Even in their old age, guys like Bruce Willis exude more manliness than any of the shirtless man-boys running around on screen. Perhaps that’s why Willis was enlisted to play the original G.I. Joe in the next installment…

Deep down, every man worth his salt has dreamed about having the grit in their spit a Sylvester Stallone character displays. Today’s men have to have a “man cave” made in their house. Pathetic… Men today are told to go to deep, dark rooms where they can vicariously live through soldiers in a video game—but don’t you dare bring that into the public sphere! The characters in a Stallone, Willis, or Schwartzenegger movie have always essentially said, “F**k your ‘man cave’! I’m going to be who I am right out in the open, and if you don’t like it I might go Rambo on you.”

This summer, any man who grew up in the 80’s is honor-bound to see this movie. If they have a son, they must take him. And if they don’t, may God and Chuck Norris have mercy on their soul.

If Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, and Chuck Norris star in the same film and you don't see it, should you be tried for treason? Perhaps.

Stallone Enlists JCVD, Chuck Norris for Expendables 2. God Is Good.

Anyone who reads this blog knows I love Stallone. I come back to him again and again and again because he’s been planted a lot of conservative seeds in the minds of young men over the years—seeds that have been fruitful. The Expendables 2 is starting to fire up its engines, and so it must be covered.

The good news: Chuck Norris. JCVD (see my post on Bloodsport if you don’t know why I’m happy).

When The Expendables hit theaters last summer, it seemed like virtually every action star of a certain age dropped by to flex their biceps and kick some keister. But apparently writer-director-star Sylvester Stallone still thinks there’s room for more macho men in the upcoming sequel. In a recent interview with EW, Stallone said that not only would Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger have meatier parts the second go-round, but that he’s also added Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme to the mix and, fingers crossed, we may even see Nicolas Cage and John Travolta getting in on the mayhem, too.

“John Travolta”? No one’s perfect. Nicolas Cage is a wild card… so I’ll withhold judgement.

The great thing about Stallone is that he writes movies with Americans who are big and bold and sure of themselves. He writes about characters who know what they believe and why they believe it. They have a big heart, but they also have big guns. Moral relativism is nowhere to be found. Characters must grind through tough times to persevere, and even when they lose the audience knows that there can be honor in defeat.

Film snobs and elitist jerks make fun of Stallone, but in between the blood and guts and greased up muscles is often some great writing that can only come from the heart. There are plenty of iconic Stallone scenes, but how many kids went to the theater and were deeply affected by the father/son speech in Rocky 6? I’d bet a good many. In it, Stallone presents a door to conservatism—it’s just up to the viewer to recognize it and walk through.

When The Expendables 2 comes out I’ll be there on opening night, if for no other reason than because I think Sly is a stand up guy who deserves to be supported. He’s a rarity in Hollywood: a conservative who makes entertaining films.

PS: Bruce Willis will be back. Yippie Kay-yay…Stylo.

Lifting Weights: The Making of a Conservative.

Weights don’t care about your race, religion, or your dad’s bank account. They don’t care about excuses. You can either lift a particular weight, or you can’t. The lessons imparted by them are embraced by conservatives. Regardless of your political stripes, they can help build a better you.

Over the years I’ve walked in quite a few different social circles, and one overlapping theme I’ve noticed is that those who are serious about weight lifting tend to either a.) have a conservative a streak that runs through them or b.) are much more open to considering the conservative point of view than my more sedentary friends. While the chicken or the egg question undoubtedly comes up, I can’t help notice that the weights impart hard lessons on anyone who’s willing to listen – and those lessons more often than not are of a conservative bent.

Weights don’t care who you are. They don’t care about your race, religion, or social status. They are colorblind. They don’t care who your dad is, where he went to school, the networks at his disposal, or his bank account. You can ether lift a particular weight, or you can’t. And if you want to be able to break personal bests and soar to great heights it ultimately will come down to your work ethic and how bad you want it. Personal trainers are great for those who need them, but they’re only an investment that can create an environment conducive to success; the best trainers in the world are still limited by their clients’ inner drive, discipline, and willingness to meet them half way.

Lifting weights requires patience. The “you” you want to sculpt is there, but like most worthwhile endeavors, success comes in incremental steps over the long haul. Success is fraught with setbacks and disappointment, and the finish line only awaits those with the persistence to work through pain, suffering, and at times unfair odds.

Conservatives who face down steel plates regularly know that they can glean important life lessons from their routines. They approach the cold, uncaring metal (that doesn’t respond to excuses or sob stories) like they do life, and they’re much better for it.

Working out with a friend or a complete stranger whose genetics or upbringing has them looking better or lifting more than you from the get go? The weights don’t care. Inequalities exist – deal with it. Work harder and smarter than the next guy. Put in hours in the gym or your basement or the garage long after everyone else is out partying, and more often than not the long haul will reward you. And if not, who cares – because there’s always someone who’s bigger and faster and stronger than you. And in the end it’s not really about the weights anyway. It’s about the work ethic that carries over into other aspects of your life without you realizing it. It’s about knowing that there’s a deeper meaning to life, and that the picture becomes clearer through sweat and effort instead of sloth and apathy.

Ultimately, our physical bodies are pieces of putty that will be ground down by time and returned to the earth, but there are diamonds inside each and every one of us. It might be in the form of an idea that changes the way the world does business, your expertise in a given field, or a body that was simply waiting for you to reveal it to the world. In each case it takes a sustained effort and a search for knowledge to discover many of our inner gems. Lifting weights has been teaching conservatives this for ages. Regardless of your political stripes, I hope you use this year to hone your talents and realize your dreams.



Stallone and YOU Stop Generation: Beta Male Liberal Leg Crossers

Stallone understands that some of us don't want Alan Alda and George Clooney to have Beta-Male babies with genetically superior leg-crossing skills.

I’m really happy to see Big Hollywood write a piece on Stallone. If you’ve read my blog before you know that I’m a huge fan of the elusive Hollywood actor with at least a few strains of conservatism in his DNA. Bruce Willis (who also has a cameo in The Expendables) is another actor I think we should raise our glasses to. Listen to Stallone’s response to a young man who wonders about the dearth of pro-America action flicks over the past few decades:

BRIAN: As I grow older one of the major things I enjoy about the 80’s action films are their high level of optimism about America and its place in the world. Whether it was Rambo 2, Rambo 3, Rocky 4, Red Dawn, etc. they made American’s feel invincible (and a bit cocky) but also proud of whom we are. The unbelievably ripped action heroes were a great physical manifestation of who we were as a nation. Post 9/11 I think many would love to feel that way again as we have transitioned from the great action heroes to action stars such as Matt Damon, Nic Cage, and Tom Cruise. All great actors but I can’t buy them as action heroes. Movies today seem to have the opposite effect and are focused too much on our flaws as nation and our failed foreign policy (Avatar, Green Zone). Do you feel this is simply because of the changing generations in Hollywood, a true reflection of the national temperature, or just an overall loss in optimism following the end of the American century that is reflected in the stories told on screen?

STALLONE: “Brian, Its 100 percent due to a transition into a different political climate than when the aforementioned films were done. That’s why it’s a minor miracle the last RAMBO would even be released, but I took a gamble there would be many people like you, who may not express themselves as clearly but really do desire to see an action film unfold that wreaks [sic] of pride and manly individualism that has unfortunately fallen out of vogue. I believe that everything is a cycle. And once again America will have its cinematic heroes reflect the incredible honor it is to be defending the most extraordinary country the planet has ever known. Just give it time, everything is a cycle.”

I disagree with Sly on one thing: he wasn’t taking a chance. There are a lot of men out there who don’t like that Hollywood wished Alan Alda and George Clooney could have a baby that looked like Matt Damon, but with beta-male genes empowered by gamma radiation. Hollywood’s elite want The Hulk, but instead of getting really angry they want him to cross his legs and purse his lips with incredible strength.

Someone should do a study to find out how many movies were made in the past decade that portray the U.S. government or explicitly the U.S. military as the antagonist, and then compare it to the number of times it was portrayed as a force for good in the world.  I’m guessing that the numbers would be downright scary (unless you’re a jihadi film club member or a socialist from San Francisco with an AMC movie card provided by your neighbor’s tax dollars).

It says something about the American people that despite the best efforts of the media, higher education, and the entertainment industry to force feed them guilt sandwiches on a daily basis, that they resist.  The American people know deep down (even if the education system is woefully failing them) that this is a good country.  And it doesn’t take much for them to understand that it’s also an exceptional country. But we need to keep up the fight. And I think that the kind of yarns Stallone creates should serve as an inspiration.

I’ve heard conservatives who would give up the fight for

Sly starts the spark, and you can provide the oxygen needed to start a conservative wildfire. Write a blog, get on Youtube, volunteer, or find another way to reach out to the next generation. The next conservative icon is waiting to discover his true calling...because of you.

popular culture because of the odds. But when the odds are against you the thing to do is to bear down and move forward. Conservatives need some grit in their spit, and they need to come out swinging a la Rocky Balboa if they’re going to win over the next generation. Shirking into the corner because guys like Ward Churchill and Kanye West populate college campuses and the entertainment industry is insanity. Neglecting young people because there are more Rachel Maddows out there than obvious Rush Limbaugh successors is equally as ridiculous. They’re there. We just need to plant the seeds and cultivate the soil. Guys like Stallone help out with movies that can start sparks of conservatism inside young minds (perhaps strong enough to power a Government Motors Chevy Volt?); it’s up to you and I to fan the flames.

Now get out there and start a blog, sign up for a social networking site, volunteer as a tutor, or get on Youtube. The next conservative icon is waiting to discover his true calling because of you.

Stallone, Barack Obama, Marvel Comics and the Very Real Secret War.

Stallone rocks. Why? Because unlike most of Hollywood, he knows the world has some pretty scary characters in it.

Do I write a post about Stallone’s new flick The Expendables, or do I cover the Obama administration’s Secret War tactics in the War on Terror? How about…both!

In the new trailer The Expendables, Stallone’s voiceover begins:

“We are the shadows…and the smoke in your eyes. We are the ghosts…that hide in the night.”

What does this mean? It means that the world is a dangerous place, and sometimes we need people to go in an clean up messes the civilized world would like to pretend don’t exist. Think the BP oil spill is a threat to humanity? Okay. But oily terrorists operating in lawless regions around the world can also cause messy explosions, gushers (of blood) on city streets, and black-charred coatings where beautiful things used to stand…

Sometimes, someone like George Bush comes around and is willing to openly talk

about the world’s scum buckets and dirt bags who’d like nothing better than to make Americans take dirt naps in densely populated urban areas. And people get angry, because if you acknowledge how susceptible free societies are to jihad nuts with a desire to return to the dark ages…it means you have a lot of tough decisions to make.

Even liberal writers like Brian Michael Bendis seem to know (really, really, deep down) that we live in a world where a Secret War or two or three or more…is being waged between competing visions for humanity’s future. The only problem is, when guys like George W. Bush are in office, liberal comic book writers come up with weird Bush-Gitmo allegories that inadvertently make the case for conservatism!

Can someone tell me when Brian Michael Bendis is going to lampoon Barack Obama in the comics for the very real “Secret War” that he’s apparently taken to another level? Don’t hold your breath:

Beneath its commitment to soft-spoken diplomacy and beyond the combat zones of Afghanistan and Iraq, the Obama administration has significantly expanded a largely secret U.S. war against al-Qaeda and other radical groups, according to senior military and administration officials..Obama, one senior military official said, has allowed “things that the previous administration did not.”

How many young voters pulled the lever for Barack Obama under the liberal auspices that we can live in harmony with jihadi head choppers if we just try really hard to “understand” and “reach” them? (My favorite is Richard Gere’s infamous post-9/11 suggestion that guys like Osama Bin Laden just need to be loved.)

It’s all a lie. The world is a dangerous place. Evil exists, despite what the Neal Gabler moral relativist Mole Men tell you. And it’s better to be honest and frank about that, because otherwise you create bizarre realities where “peace activists” (who try to slice through your liver with gigantor-knives when their cargo is about to be inspected) can play the victim-card. You also have scenarios play out where young people say, “Umm…what happened to all that hopeandchange?” (Yes, that’s one word):

The Obama administration has rejected the constitutional executive authority claimed by Bush and has based its lethal operations on the authority Congress gave the president in 2001 to use “all necessary and appropriate force against those nations, organizations, or persons” he determines “planned, authorized, committed, or aided” the Sept. 11 attacks.

Many of those currently being targeted, Bellinger said, “particularly in places outside Afghanistan,” had nothing to do with the 2001 attacks.

Weren’t there a lot of Democrats that voted for that? Hmmm. Nevermind.

The hopeandchange never materialized because it was never there. I bet the kiddies are feeling pretty numb, right now. It’s okay Thunder Kiss, conservatism will welcome you with open arms when the reality hits that it’s a strange, strange world (incompatible with “planned” economies and Youtube Diplomacy).

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a Stallone trailer to watch.

Hey Bendis, do you mind telling me when you’re going to roast Barack Obama for his Secret War? Want to weigh in, Marvel? Didn’t think so. Hypocrites. Deep down, all of these guys are furious that George W. Bush is going to be largely vindicated.

Tea Party Cowboy Bebop. Bounty: Unprincipled Politicians.

I was going to incorporate Golgo 13 into a post today, but then I thought that Janeane Garafolo would freak out if I used one of the world’s coolest assassins to to point out that conservatives need to have his focus (on the intellectual issues) in the months ahead.

If I innocuously write about a manga assassin and the Tea Party movement in the same post, will Ms. Huffington go apoplectic? If so: score.

That last thing I want is for Keith all white people are racists Olbermann making the leap in logic that I want to kill the president because I have an occasional thing for manga and classic Nintendo theme songs.

Since that’s the case, I guess I’ll turn it down a notch and ask the Tea Party to adopt a Cowboy Bebop mentality for the next few months—bounty hunters in an era where cash is tight and misery reigns. This year’s bounty: unprincipled politicians and weak-kneed sad sacks who roll over and give the dependence peddlers a “victory.” (And yes Ms. Huffington, that’s metaphorically speaking.) Haven’t these guys ever been told that there aren’t any permanent victories in Washington? It’s an ongoing philosophical battle…

“…some Republicans are losing their nerve on repeal. Rep. Mark Kirk, who is running for the Senate in Illinois, signed the repeal pledge and even vowed to “lead the effort” for repeal, but has since backed off, declaring “I voted against it, but we lost.

Wrong. Wrong. And…wrong. Conservatives didn’t lose anything because it’s not over. It’s never over. Nothing.Is. Ever. Over. Not enough Stallone for you, lilly-livered Republican Congressmen out there? Okay. Try this one:

The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very rough, mean place. And I no matter how tough you are, it will always bring you to your knees and keep you there—permanently—if you let it.
You or nobody ain’t never gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard ya hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. If you know what you’re worth, go out and get what you’re worth—but you gotta be willing to take the hit.

We already know what most politicians are “worth” (i.e., Cornhusker Kickback). However, for those who actually have a shred of core principles left inside, I’d like to know what their job is worth. What are they willing to lose an election over? If they’re not willing to fight for the repeal of blatantly unconstitutional health care measures (or at least a massive rollback) and “take the hits” that come their way from it, then in my opinion they’re hopeless and need to go. Although, I’m not sure why anyone would be afraid of running on a repeal of Obamacare with poll numbers the way they are.

Personally, I think the Republican Party has a whole slew of problems, the least of which is demonstrated daily by a guy who tries too hard to be “cool.” And it shows, as Jon Stewart’s “lesbian bondage fiasco” muppet skit painfully (but accurately) points out. The Tea Party movement needs to continue to not show an allegiance to any particular party, since both of them are filled with people who need remedial courses in First Principles. So please, this November, send the liberals home; send the liberals who call themselves “progressives” home; send the fake conservatives home; and let’s get rid of everyone else who’s willing to sell out their country for a couple of surreptitiously earmarked bridges, hospitals, and a highway with their name on it.

In short: let’s Bebop (just not in the way Michael Steel would mean it).

This November, the "bounty" is unprincipled politicians of all stripes.

Conservatives, Rocky Balboa, and Spider-Man: Lessons to Remember.

Now that the Health Care bill has passed and all those nasty little details Americans would have liked to know about beforehand are turning up, conservatives have a large task ahead of them. Some of them have been mumbling to us, and some of them, like Paul Ryan, have been downright inspirational. However, I’m a little concerned about the mumblers,

Listen to Spidey: “Anyone can win a fight when the odds are easy! It’s when the going gets tough–when there seems to be no chance–that’s when it counts!”

and the affect they’ll have on people who are primed for action if someone would just speak clearly. And, since I suppose the mumblers are only going to grow in numbers over the coming months, I think the answer is to dismiss them outright and concentrate on the following: Comic Books!

People make fun of comic books all the time, but there are a lot of life lessons one can glean from them if they look in the right place. Take Amazing Spider-Man #33, for instance. For those of you who are not nerds, I’ll break it down quickly and easily for you:

  • Spider-Man is trapped under tons of metal and his Aunt’s life depends on success in freeing himself from the rubble and getting medicine to her that is just out of reach. Period.

Faced with seemingly impossible odds, it’s always easy to give up and just live with the consequences (or perhaps die with the consequences…) How many times during your life have you felt the weight of the world on your shoulders and wanted to just throw your hands in the air and call it quits? How easy is it to just walk away? Years ago I was listening to Rush Limbaugh talk about bookstores and the rows of self-help sections on how to become a more positive person—and the complete and utter absence of books on how to tone it down and become more pessimistic. That’s because nothing is easier than looking at a problem and coming to the conclusion that the odds are too long. It’s hard to look deep down inside yourself, find that mettle that you never knew you had, and charge forward with the grit and determination needed to make it through life’s long slogs.

If conservative leaders aren’t leading—forget them. Find new leaders, become one yourself, or encourage the grassroots to take matters into their own hands. The time for finger-pointing and in-fighting is over. Take off those mind-forged manacles and realize that you and your friends and family have much more power than you realize if you just have faith, patience, persistence, and a positive attitude.

Now get there and win this thing… cause Mickey loves ya!

“If you ever get hurt and you feel like you’re going down, a little angel is going to whisper in your ear, ‘Get up you sonofab*tch!—Cause Doug loves ya!'”

Christopher Buckley: Elitist Conservative Simpsons Comic Book Guy.

It seems as though Chistopher Buckley can no longer deny that he was wrong. Really, really, wrong. Instead of concentrating on why it happened, I’d like to concentrate on why he’s the elitist conservative circle’s Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons. Sure, it would be easy to liken Christopher to Homer in this situation – especially since they both bought into hopeandchange – but that analogy ultimately misses the mark. And sure, Buckley has a Professor Frink education, but that too falls short.

I wouldn't trade my love for Christopher Buckley for Amazing Fantasy #15!

It’s the condescension that only the Comic Book guy possesses within The Simpsons universe that is classic Christopher Buckley (Or David Frum, but that’s another blog for another time). It’s the “I know better than you, rube” demeanor that oozes from his being that demands someone go “Clubber Lang” on him in response. It’s the kind of mentality that processes Sarah Palin and let’s out a Darth Vader-worthy “Noooooo!” before ever listening to a word she says.

The Christopher Buckley’s of the world don’t get it that people like you and I can read Eric Hoffer’s True Believer: Thoughts on the Nature of Mass Movements on a Monday night, and then get psyched over a repeat showing of Rambo First Blood on Tuesday. They don’t understand how some of us can appreciate Milton’s Paradise Lost AND GNR’s Paradise City.

And the kind of mentality that doesn’t get you and I for those reasons produces conservatives who will vote for a liberal like Obama if they feel he listens to Vivaldi’s Four Seaons: Spring.

Well, I got news for “conservatives” like that: “Murdock…I’m coming to get YOU.”

MSNBC Cocktail Party Conservatives Beware.