Bendis’ Tony Stark ‘loves’ woman he’s been on about 2 dates with; Invincible Iron Man #13 a giant boredom bubble

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It was just under one year ago that Brian Michael Bendis’ Invincible Iron Man launched. Yours truly was excited at its potential, and even gave the first handful of issues rave reviews. Then, something weird happened. IIM became a plodding tale about Tony Stark’s search for an identity. He sat around his lab and, for all intents and purposes, did his own version of Derek Zoolander’s, “Who am I?” into a puddle of water.

IIM #13 is the culmination of a book that promised to take readers to great places when in reality it only gave them Victor Von Doom (looking quite a bit like Rand Paul) locked inside an energy bubble.

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Here is what you need to know about IIM #13:

  • Doom takes Tony to Cambridge, where biochemical engineer Amara Perera is illegally testing her experimental Alzheimer’s drugs.
  • Doom and Tony argue about whether or not they are friends or enemies.
  • Tony tries to explain why he didn’t tell his girlfriend that he was going undercover or get word to her that he didn’t die in Japan.
  • Amara Perera tells Tony “I don’t know anything about you,” and moments later he confesses his love.
  • Tony tells Amara about James Rhodes dying, leaves, and then spends time in his lab thinking about Rhodey. He does not attend the hero’s funeral.
  • Doom returns to torment Tony and is locked inside “a zero-point energy web net.” Tony says he wants answers. “You’re going to tell me why you’re all over me. Why? Why have you decided to be in my life all of a sudden? Why? Why me?” he asks.

Marvel fans already have a good idea how all of this will turn, given that IIM is going to be launched with RiRi Williams as Ironheart — and that Infamous Iron Man, “Iron Doom” will launch in October.

Before we move on, let us go over our Mighty Marvel Checklist:

  • Superior Spider-Man? Check.
  • Hydra-Cap? Check.
  • Infamous Iron Man? Check. 
  • Bruce Banner killed because he might go Infamous Hulk on everyone? Check.

Interesting pattern, Marvel. It seems like Tony isn’t the only one having an identity crisis…

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What makes IIM #13 even worse is that Mr. Bendis is doing — on a much smaller level — what Dan Slott did with Peter Parker’s “close” girlfriend, Lian Tang (i.e., the one who tried to murder him).

It has been established that Amara Perera is a smart woman, but she and Tony’s “relationship” consists of a small bit of playful banter and cross-talk early on in the book. How does that translate into “love,” and why would Tony say that to a woman who a.) agreed to be “taken off the grid” by Doctor Doom, and b.) suddenly calls the villain “Victor”?

Answer: It would not translate into love.

Tony would not say that, and readers should be insulted that Bendis would make him go there with a woman who has always been skittish about his lifestyle, personality, and double-life as Iron Man.

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In short, if you have read IIM this long then you may as well buy the last issue before the relaunch. If you are considering Infamous Iron Man for you pull list, then just be aware that Iron Doom may essentially be the tale of Victor Von Zoolander.